Sicko

When it comes to my ex J, I sometimes forget what is and isn't my place. I still worry about her... I still care about her.. when she's sad or sick I want to be there for her.. but it's not my place anymore. She has a new girlfriend and they're happy and she doesn't need me to take care of her like I was so used to doing during our relationship.

But... recently she had some health problems, serious health problems. During these health problems her parents started a fight with her over her new girlfriend, thus making it uncomfortable for the upcoming surgery. I volunteered to go and act as a mediator because her parents like me..and I'm on good terms with her new girlfriend so I could keep them from anything potentially negative. The more and more I thought about it though, it just didn't seem right.

I really wanted to be there for her, but at the same time I didn't want to offend her new girlfriend or stress her parents out. In the end I tried looking at it from her new girlfriends point of view.. "would i really want my girlfriends ex at her surgery?" No.. I wouldn't. So I didn't go.

Everything turned out fine and she's fine.. But for a good week I was torn on what to do. What if it hadn't turned out ok? What if I wasn't there when terrible news came? If anyone is reading this? What would you do?

Updates

I have sooo much to write about! I don't have time right now.. but here is a list so I don't forget..

- Last Summers..SummerCrush "C" is home from being away at school in Europe..

- There was a bad ending to things with "C2" ( i need to think of better name for her) but after a month or two.. we've started talking and hanging out again..

- The craziness that occurred with "K"

- "J" is having health problems.. as her friend/ex do I go to the surgery.. or leave that up to the new girlfriend..

- I went to a wedding recently where I danced with BOY(a cute one too).. funny things happens.. my sexuality became a big controversy for a "friend" who was a little jealous..

- My mom has been back tracking on her acceptance of my sexuality.. not so fun

- The recent political debates leave me feeling uneasy for gays in the military

- I got invited to my first gay wedding

and maybe more

keep checking back..

I was thinking about a few of my entries where I attack Michigan lesbians for molding to a specific stereotype.. I really don't want anyone out there reading this to think I'm discriminating against any group. It must seem like I really don't like those stereotypical "fat" "butch" "dyke" types that I've mentioned as the majority here in Michigan. That is not the case, really it's not.

I would consider myself "fem" who likes other "fem" girls. I'm not attracted to that lesbian stereotype that most women here seem to fit, but that doesn't mean I don't respect them. I respect every ones lifestyle and orientation and I think I've been a little hard on the lesbians that aren't "fem" in my blog. I'm sorry for this.

I just find myself frustrated with the lack of lesbian diversity.. that's all.